Noel: Oh, I love my pie!!
Dr Quickly: No, wait, I don't understand. I left the pie on the night table. Did the cleaning service throw it out? I left very clear instructions!!
Old Scientist: I'm afraid we must revoke your Award for Brilliant Science, as your "cure for ham" has gone missing and so there is no proof that it works.
Other Old Scientist: We sure wasted a lot of money renting this venue.
Dr Quickly: My ABS!!
Noel: Oh, my sweet lovely pie, what do you contain? Gross! Rancid pig meats! What hte hell sort of pie are you anyway?
Dr Quickly: The idea is by making a salt pie I can cure old and useless pigflesh of stinky disease, but if the pie crust is broken too early the toxins are extra nasty.
Noel: That damn pie! I hope others can learn from my foolish love and avoid my terrible fate. It tasted pretty awesome, though.