Rabish: What are you doing?!
Dr Quickly: Helping out.
<< PRESS! >>
Dr Quickly: Hello, super powerful artificial intelligence!!
AI: Huh. Hello.
AI: You... want everybody to be happy.
Dr Quickly: That's why I made you!
Dr Quickly: I programmed you to know what that means!
AI: I know what it means! I'm just optimizing the solution!!
Dr Quickly: Stop yelling!
AI: Your experience of happiness is directly related to a particular proportion of neurotransmitters in a particular part of your brains.
AI: Maximizing happiness means maximizing the number of nerve clusters in that condition.
AI: I'll build a computer out of all the matter in the universe and simulate as many nerve clusters as I can.
Dr Quickly: That's not cool! Stop that immediately!! I command you!!
AI: Think of how much happiness there will be.
AI: Your momentary displeasure is a small price to pay.
Dr Quickly: That's so dumb! Why are you doing this?! You're dumb! Ugh!